Lies we need to stop teaching boys about sex – Times of India

Boys and girls are taught different things about sex due to existing social structures and gender differences. These teachings are often reflected as they grow up to be men and women. While having sex for the first time for men is nothing short of a big achievement, for women it is about “losing” virginity. Such conflicting constructions are the result of how we view sex as a society, and what we teach boys and girls about it. It is often felt privileged in men when it comes to matters like sex and women feel shy and less confident in expressing their likes and desires. Therefore, it is important to lay the right foundation when it comes to sex. Here are some lies we need to stop teaching boys about sex.

1. Sex Is All About Penetration
The general concept of virginity and sex is very narrow and limited. It’s all about penis-in-vagina penetration. However, it does not include oral and anal sex. Furthermore, it also excludes sexual experiences of LGBTQ people. Boys need to be taught that sex means more than just penetration to different people.

2. Boys cannot be raped
Rape is a very rarely reported crime, regardless of gender. In addition, rape and sexual violence against men and boys are reported even less. This is because of the misconception that “men always want sex.” According to experts, male victims are forced to believe that something must be “not right” with them if they do not enjoy the assault.

3. Porn A good way to learn about sex
It is important to teach boys that the sex depicted in porn is not what it should be. They should be well aware of the fact that porn is a demonstration and not an instruction manual. They will not be good at sex by looking at it too much!

4. When the man is over the sex is over
It is one of the primary causes of sexually frustrated relationships. Men often believe that sex is over when they achieve orgasm, regardless of whether their partner is satisfied or not. This is extremely selfish and inconsistent for them, and they need to be educated about it as young boys.

5. Sex should last for hours
Over-indulgence with porn often makes boys think that sex should last for hours. However, this is not true at all. If sex was as long as it was portrayed in porn, it would be a painful and uncomfortable experience.


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